Self control is having the opportunity to think on lesser things, yet choosing to think on greater things.
Self control is knowing I can think negatively about someone, yet choosing to think positively and hopefully.
Self control is knowing I have the freedom to think and act impurely, yet choosing to think and act purely.
Self control is not the power to say no, but knowledge of what is even more powerful and the choice to say yes to those things. Self control is the power to say “Yes” to greater things. And living with that kind of power is a strength no one can steal from you. Because you’re choosing your self to live in a certain way that thinks and acts beyond the short-term moment.
Lack of self control, or the choice to choose the lesser things, helps nobody, not even you. It teaches you to take the easy route and fulfill your immediate desire with no thought to others or your real identity or your future. Being uncontrolled or freely admitting that something else controls you is simply selfish. And selfishness will destroy you over time. It will destroy your generosity, compassion, love, peace, joy, faith and goodness. Self-centered living will destroy your self-freedom. You will be a slave to yourself, ironically. And then it will hijack your world around you. One day you will wake up and realize you have no true friendships, only ones you facade into your life because they facilitate you getting what you want.
And then I really will have sorrow for you. Because now you have to live with yourself everyday. And it’s not that I or anyone else is better than you; it just that many people who want to have controlled lives evaluate decisions one at a time and think, “Does this control me, or do I control it? Which is the greater thing to choose?”
You are tomorrow who you choose to be today. Though don’t be arrogant to judge those who have narcissist tendencies, who use everyone around them as tools in their game, or make life and all conversations and relationships about themselves. You or I could be there too, and very simply actually.
The difference is in the decision. Every decision is to say yes to one thing and no to something else. The thing is, though, you’ll never know what path you could’ve had if you had made different decisions.
You don’t want to be a self-absorbed, abusive person one day? Stop making uncontrolled, selfish decisions today. You were made to be so much more. Control what you eat, what you drink, what you wear, who your friends are, the words you speak, the words you don’t speak, the atmosphere you surround yourself with, and the deeds you do every day.
There are so many things that are out of your control to deal with as it is. You can’t control circumstances that are thrown at you, how others treat or mistreat you, or the general economy of life and culture. Maybe we should start controlling ourselves with those personal decisions and choose to live for the greater things instead of the lesser things, the selfish things. It might not make a difference today, but it might create a legacy in 40 years instead of having a life wasted that has truly impacted nobody. It’s a harsh reality that you could one day be sitting on thrones of gold in fields of rubies and be totally and absolutely bankrupt.
Tell yourself what you will choose today. And please, love everyone who is in your present and your future enough to not be selfish, but to instead choose the greater things.